First, we’re killing them with kindness. We do this by giving them
“feelgood” programs and pabulum information. We divert them from
the very things they should be doing for themselves—we take away their responsibility.
We tell them problems only happen to others. We toss them candy for reciting the correct answers and take them to the
circus. We tell them it’s merely about “asking for help” and
going to three free visits. Life is all about easy answers.
Then, we smother them with love. “We’ll be there for you,”
we gush. The “police family” is here to help shoulder their
burden. Talk to another officer, or just talk to a peer support officer. That alone should make them feel better.
Three free visits could make them feel even better. Getting
back out on the street quickly “is a healthy thing.” No matter what
happens, they can trust us—We're their codependents.
Then, we smother them with hate. We refuse to give them the emotional tools they need to defend themselves. We let them become “obese” in their minds and tell them
nothing about diet. We encourage them to build muscles in their arms,
but say nothing about preparing ahead of time for stress and trauma. Instead,
we send them out, unarmed to defend themselves against emotional enemies.
When they return, we pretend not to see their wounds. If they
show emotion, we call them “crazy.” If they drink, we call them
a drunk. If they fly off the handle or, worse, get in trouble, we call them
"bad cops," discipline them and look no further. A chill descends if they
take time off for “stress.” There is silence when they come
back, especially if they went outside the “family.”
We turn our eyes to all but the most obvious signs of despair.
They no longer have a family.
If they file a disability claim for “stress,” they are “riding the system.” Partners
will no longer want to ride with them, especially if they think they're taking “meds.” Others will wonder why they're allowed to carry a weapon. Most
departments will automatically take it away.
If they retire, their telephone will fall silent.
At whatever point they commit suicide, we will insist we saw nothing. We
will be “shocked” and surprised and bury them ever so quietly and with no honors. We will accept no responsibility, instead blaming the officer for "not requesting help." We will refuse
to admit if it was due to the job.
Finally, we will shun their spouse and children for having brought dishonor
to the badge.
We have killed another of our officers. How long will our leaders allow this to continue?
